There’s no place like home for the holidays. Or so they say. Gathering with friends and family is a treat, but when you have hearing loss, it also takes work.
It’s not easy for anyone to hear in a crowded room or across a large dining table, but there are extra challenges for people with hearing loss. Not only are we battling the music and the buzz of other speakers. We are playing a never-ending game of Wheel of Fortune to help us fill in the blanks we don’t hear, hiding among the sounds we do.
Is he talking about a cat, a new flat, or maybe scat? Knowing the context helps, but that is not always easy to determine in a fast-moving conversation. Lipreading helps fill in some of the gaps, but it can only do so much since only 30-40% of speech sounds are visible on the lips.
It takes skill to combine all this information into the right words and phrases that give meaning to what someone is saying. Hopefully, you got the gist because now it’s your turn to reply! I get tired just thinking about it.
Shift in Mindset Can Help
It can be tempting to avoid holiday parties entirely—stay home and read a book or watch a film with the captions turned on. But withdrawing into yourself is not the answer. Do it too much, and it can also be dangerous. Isolation has been linked to higher rates of depression, loneliness, and even cognitive issues. Plus, it’s not a lot of fun.
Despite the challenges of the season, we must find ways to stay engaged. But how? A shift in mindset can help.
Focus on communicating better rather than hearing better
You may not hear well at a holiday party, but you can learn to communicate better. Use all the tech tools at your disposal: remote microphones, noise-canceling features, and speech-to-text apps. Everyone loves a cool tech tool, so don’t try to hide them. Ask your family and friends to help you experiment with the latest gadgets.
Non-technical strategies like using communication best practices are also critical for creating a conducive environment for conversation. Let others know about your hearing loss and be specific in telling them what you need them to do to create a better listening situation. This is not being selfish.
It is self-advocacy and both sides of the conversation will benefit.
It doesn’t have to be perfect.
Remind yourself that fun does not require perfection. You can still enjoy connecting with friends and family even if you don’t hear every word they say perfectly. Try to laugh at the inevitable mis-hearings instead of feeling embarrassed by them.
Laughter is a wonderful way to connect with others. Your goal is only to optimize the situation, rather than create perfection.
Schedule downtime.
Arrive at the party early when it will be less crowded (less noisy!) and so you can scope out the quieter areas of the space. Pick the best seat at the table for yourself or stake out a quiet corner. Scheduling quiet time ahead of loud events will build up your energy reserves.
It’s like putting your mask on first in an airplane emergency before helping others. Investing in your health and well-being during the holiday season will help you bring your best self to the task of communication.
Forgive yourself.
Communication mistakes will happen. Let them go. Forgive yourself. And forgive others too. Many people struggle during the holidays for a multitude of reasons. Kindness is key.
Happy Holidays!
For more Hearing Hacks for the Holidays, read Hear & Beyond: Live Skillfully with Hearing Loss. Or download our free holiday communication checklist.
Now get out there and enjoy!
Shari Eberts is a passionate hearing health advocate and internationally recognized author and speaker on hearing loss issues. She is the founder of Living with Hearing Loss, a popular blog and online community for people with hearing loss, and an executive producer of We Hear You, an award-winning documentary about the hearing loss experience. Her book, Hear & Beyond: Live Skillfully with Hearing Loss, (co-authored with Gael Hannan) is the ultimate survival guide to living well with hearing loss. Shari has an adult-onset genetic hearing loss and hopes that by sharing her story, she will help others to live more peacefully with their own hearing issues. Connect with Shari: Blog, Facebook, LinkedIn, Twitter.
