Don’t you just love when people throw out those sayings and clichés to help you through a situation?
Like, when one door closes, another opens. What’s that supposed to mean for a person with hearing loss – that when you lose your hearing, you appreciate your eyes a lot more? That might be true, but I wouldn’t think, oh OK, I didn’t really enjoy hearing all that much, anyway.
This week, I looked up some other bits of wisdom to see how they might fit the life with hearing loss. My comments follow each quote.
“If at first you don’t succeed, Try, try, try again…”
…and then get a hearing aid.
“How do I love thee?” – Elizabeth Barrett Browning
I love thee a lot…I just can’t hear thee.
“Beauty is in the eye of the beholder.”
And I’d like to behold yours, so please move your hands from your face so I can speechread.
“You miss 100% of the shots you never take.” – Wayne Gretzky
You also miss 100% of the words you pretend to hear. Stop bluffing.
“You must be the change you wish to see in the world.” – Ghandi
(Loudly) I WISH THAT PEOPLE WOULD SPEAK UP!!!!
“Never be afraid to laugh at yourself, after all, you could be missing out on the joke of the century.” – Dame Edna Everage
People with hearing loss are laughing at the joke – because other people are. We ourselves didn’t catch it.
“No man is an island.” – John Donne
Trust me, when I can’t hear the group conversation at a party, I’m alone on my own little island.
“Friends…countrymen, lend me your ears!” – Shakespeare
Nah, ours don’t work so good…borrow somebody else’s.
“People who live in glass houses should not throw stones.”
Peeps with hearing aids and cochlear implants would never live in such a noisy thing as a glass house.
“Use it or lose it.”
This is the scary thing researchers are telling us – unaddressed hearing loss can lead to mental health issues. Also, dementia.
“Better late than never.”
See ‘use it or lose it’ above. Address your hearing loss.
“There’s no such thing as a free lunch.”
Or a free hearing aid.
“Never look a gift horse in the mouth.”
So, if you do manage to score a free hearing aid, you shouldn’t ask, “don’t you have one a little less ugly?”
“God helps those who help themselves.”
Alrighty then! I’m doing my best to hear as hard as I can – perhaps God could chip in and take away this tinnitus?
“You can’t always get what you want.”
Oh, now you tell me…I believed the one above.
“Actions speak louder than words.”
I’m glad something does!
“Practice makes perfect.”
I’ve been practicing ‘Hearing’ for years – and it’s still not perfect. However, I can change a hearing aid battery without dropping it, so I feel pretty good about that.
“A chain is only as strong as its weakest link.”
Hard of hearing kids are definitely the weakest link in that stupid whispering game called Telephone or Chinese Whispers. When it got to us, we just made up some words. If someone whispered “this is a great party” , we just smiled, nodded, and whispered to the kid next to us, “the person on my other side has bad breath.”
“Honesty is the best policy.”
True, but try getting a hard of hearing person, nodding her head at everything you say, to admit she hasn’t got a clue what you’re saying.
“Absence makes the heart grow fonder.”
Also true – I really did miss my hearing aid when the dog ate it.
“Every cloud has a silver lining.”
I suppose so. Not hearing other people’s body sounds is a definite plus.
“If you can’t say something nice, don’t say nothin’ at all.” – Thumper
The same thing goes if you can’t face me and speak clearly. Just don’t speak.
“Misery loves company.”
It doesn’t make me feel good to know millions of other people are going through the same tinnitus thing as me. OK, yes it does.
“The best way to a man’s heart is through his stomach.”
Not the hard of hearing guy. You get his heart through good communication.
“What goes around, comes around.”
If you nagged your spouse for years about getting their hearing checked, remember your own advice when your personal hearing starts to go.
“The Lord loves a cheerful idiot.”
My grandpa, a preacher with a great sense of humor, always aid this. It’s probably not politically correct and has nothing to do with hearing loss, but it makes me laugh, so I’ll end here.